We live in a rich, diverse world where the depths of understanding about leadership have not yet been fully plumbed. Yet, despite our gaps in understanding, we are a species that seeks out role models and leaders. We want to follow something or somebody.
People follow purpose.
People are not just interested in how intelligent or technically proficient you are. This alone, will not satisfy them. They are also interested in why you are doing what you are doing and for what reason. They want to hear the greater story. They are interested in your purpose.
When your words and actions don’t match, people notice. They get curious. Something doesn’t quite add up and this has the potential to generate doubt and hesitancy in those you are trying to lead. If you lead in a way that displays commitment to your purpose, the hesitancy and resistance in others subsides.
Leading with purpose also helps you to influence the future. You don’t live on this planet in isolation. You are part of a much wider system that you have interacted with since infancy. As a leader, you are still interacting with this system and you have a part to play in the shape and future of it. If you can begin to get clarity about your purpose in your career, then you will know what part to play. You will proactively influence the future you want.
Your journey as a leader is a story.
How do you want the story to end? And if you are not completely clear about that, what sections of the story do you want to write today?
What is your purpose as a leader? We want to encourage you today to engage in this question of substance. It will serve you well. As Viktor Frankl said, “Ever more people today have the means to live, but no meaning to live for.”
Questions to consider:
As a leader, what are you most deeply committed to?
For whom, or for what reason are you doing what you are doing?
Johnny Parks
Sometimes in our conversations with leaders we find they are discontented and frustrated in their careers. Most of the time when they feel this way it is because they are unclear about their values and unsure of what to do. Often they seek a change in role or move to a different organisation, which does nothing more than put a sticking plaster over the real issue of being unfulfilled.
Understanding and aligning yourself with your values, as a leader, is important if you are to remain true to who you want to be and committed for the long haul.
We understand a value to be “a deeply-held, unconscious learning that drives a behaviour.” It is something that you have learnt about people, yourself and the world through your experiences, initially as a child and then in later life. Values are part of the deep structure of our leadership. Since values are associated with worth, meaning and desire they act as a primary source for a leader’s internal motivation. When our values are not met or matched then we feel incongruent and know that something is not quite right.
Therefore, it is important that we take time to reflect on and articulate what our current career values are. When we know our values we are free to find the best way to satisfy our deepest needs. As a leader when we operate from a place that is true to our values, then we are energised, motivated and in alignment with who we truly are.
Some questions it may be useful to consider:
- What is important to you in the context of your career? (name 5-8 things)
- How am I ensuring that my needs and desires are being satisfied in my current role?
- In what ways can I communicate my values to my team to allow them to understand me better?
William H Murray, the late Scottish Himalayan Explorer once said, “Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness. Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation), there is one elementary truth the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then providence moves too.”
Commitment. It’s a resource that we can mine. Without it, leadership is about going through the motions.
Murray makes the connection between commitment and providence. His hypothesis states that with commitment we will also enter into the mysterious world of providence. This may be a leap for some however; it is useful for a minute to explore.
When leaders operate with a sense of commitment something seems to happen. By commitment we mean when they have a clear and precise sense of purpose that is aligned with their values (what’s deeply important to them) and identity (who they are). When leading from this place, they can be extremely compelling. Others notice them. They become more attractive and their language and behaviours carry a natural authority. In a sense, they tap into an accessible, yet elusive form of power. And others will follow them.
They are committed.
Yesterday, I coached a leader in the bank. He was talking about his boss and stated, “He has passion and integrity. I know exactly where I stand. He doesn’t get it right all the time but I’d follow him anywhere.”
His boss was displaying the type of commitment that Murray is referencing. Limited hesitancy, limited fear, confidence, security. And by being committed, others were noticing and responding positively. My coachee recognised his commitment and was prepared to follow.
When you become truly committed other things happen. Positive things that might be outside of your control. Things that will pleasantly surprise you and build your confidence. This is providence. To access this, you need to display commitment.
Questions:
• What is your purpose in your career?
• What story are you trying to write?
• How can you align yourself with your values and purpose in work?
Johnny Parks
This blog will draw upon the wisdom of Dr. Al Siebert, a famous psychologist, and of course, Bruce Springsteen. Wait a minute, but what can Bruce Springsteen tell us about resilience? Here’s a small slice of the advice he gave young musicians and entrepreneurs at the SXSW conference in Texas last week:
“Open your ears, open your hearts. Don’t take yourselves too seriously and take yourself as seriously as death itself … Have iron clad confidence. But doubt! It keeps you awake and alert. … It keeps you honest. Be able to keep two completely contradictory ideas alive and well in your heart and head at all times. If it does not drive you crazy it will make you strong.”
So, has Bruce been dancing in the dark too long or is he onto something? How can this apparently mixed up view be of benefit?
Well, it seems that Dr. Al Siebert, a world authority on resilience concurs. He has interviewed thousands of people, from disaster survivors to top executives to identify the mindsets and characteristics of resilient people. He observed that people who are able to embrace counter-balanced, paradoxical personality qualities in themselves are more likely to be resilient over their lifetime. These people demonstrated and accepted characteristics such as pessimistic optimism, extroverted introversion and playful seriousness.
Embracing paradoxical qualities doesn’t mean sitting in a ‘grey’ place dealing with constant uncertainty. In reality, there is a lot about people, relationships, teams and the life of an organisation that is paradoxical and non-linear; being able to accept and welcome paradox will help you read situations more quickly. This mindset will also support you to be curious and flexible, be able to adapt more quickly to situations that you haven’t previously encountered and to be willing to keep learning; all crucial mindsets for developing resilience.
Dr. Siebert says “The more that you are comfortable with internal counter-balanced qualities, the more you can manage the complex, counter-balanced forces essential for resiliency in your organisation.” That’s probably what Bruce was trying to say in the first place.
- what obstacles or difficult relationships might you face this week and how will you deal with them?
- what other ways can you deal with these?
Andy McBride
“Shallow men believe in luck. Strong men believe in Cause and Effect”. Ralph Waldo Emerson
As a leader, if you want to positively impact the culture around you, then you will need to take increased responsibility. As you understand with greater awareness the role that you play in shaping the culture and mission of your organisation, a challenge arises as to how you are going to behave.
A concept that we find useful is that of ‘cause’ and ‘effect’.
‘Effect’ is when a leader looks for reasons to let themselves off the hook and externalise responsibility to others. This allows them to feel safe and rationalise that it is someone else’s fault in order to protect their own reputation. They may have well rehearsed reasons for why they don’t achieve what they want.This may sound quite extreme, however being in ‘effect’ can manifest itself in subtle ways. For example a conversation in which you avoid rather than challenge a direct report’s behaviour, or a personal development area that you have started but for which your enthusiasm has now waned.
‘Cause’ on the other hand, is where a leader has clarity about what it is that they want and takes responsibility for this. They operate with a greater sense of purpose and courage to achieve the results that they desire. They develop a strong internal locus of control.
People who are at ‘cause’ tend to take responsibility, become the sort of leaders they want to become and do the sorts of things they want to do.
Today, ask yourself the question, which side will you be on, cause or effect?
Adrian Eagleson
One of the important concepts that we introduce in many of our programmes is that of Toward & Away. Toward & Away is a helpful model derived from a psychological concept called ‘Approach and Avoidance’, that is both challenging and useful.
Toward and Away looks at two types of motivation. The ‘Away’ motivation outlines how someone is primarily motivated to move away from what they don’t want or what they don’t like, in their past or in their current circumstances. This can be highly motivational, however, it is unsustainable because the further the person moves away from the incident they don’t like, the more their initial motivation declines.
Therefore, they can get caught in a trap where they unconsciously create crisis or chaos to recover the motivation.
This can generate a very chaotic environment with lots of change, restructure and a culture that is focused on what it doesn’t want rather than what it wants.
This is fundamentally different from the ‘Toward’ motivation. A person who has a ‘Toward’ motivation has much more clarity about what they want and who they want to be. They have set aside time and energy to outline what they want in the future and who they want to be in the process of achieving this.
They will have thought about the obstacles and the derailers that may exist between the present and the achieved destination and they will have already imagined how to address or overcome these. This is a much more sustainable motivation.
Whilst there may not be immediate short-term highs, there is long-term, sustainable, upward growth for the individual in achieving what it is they have set out to deliver.
We would encourage you to spend time thinking about the following questions:
• As you think about your career what specifically do you want?
• As you think about achieving that, what type of person do you want to be?
• What challenges might you encounter in achieving this and how will you address them?
If you can begin to get clarity about these things then you will be nurturing a habit that will allow for long-term sustainable growth.
Johnny Parks
In nearly all of our courses we look at the Drama Triangle and the three roles that we play in it. It’s a theme that crops up in coaching many times and you’ve probably noticed the part that you tend to play in the workplace, whether you are predominantly entering the drama triangle as a Rescuer, Victim or Persecutor.
The fact is that nearly every human interaction in which power plays a role or where people are failing to take responsibility for feelings or actions, or are in denial about something usually means that the drama triangle game of musical chairs is in full swing.
I’m often intrigued by the naturally occurring questions provoked by this topic which are often simply around the mechanics of how to step out of the drama. However a lot of people ask “Why should I bother to do this if I don’t have a guarantee that others will also do it?”
This last question is revealing; it highlights that stepping out of the triangle can feel like a loss of power and on a deeper level like a dilution of our identity. “I couldn’t possibly leave Bob to do that by himself. Without my help he’ll struggle, and anyway it gives me peace of mind to know that it has been done correctly” or “If they don’t do it right next time, I’ll really give it to them. Someone needs to act.”
From a distance, and from the perspective of your predominant roles, changing behaviour to take responsibility and act in a more truthful manner can feel in certain situations as though you are standing idly by, ducking out of a duty, or even casting yourself off from a source of assistance. But when we understand how toxic it is to constantly remain in the triangle, it becomes worthwhile to work out how you are going to step out.
We can make the choice to get off the triangle for ourselves, and by doing so, change the dynamic between with the other people involved by that very act. We don’t have to wait for anyone else to change to give us permission to do so. In reality, how others see us can’t be our primary concern in this context, it is how we see ourselves that is the main lever for change.
Exiting the drama triangle begins by understanding where you are now, not denying true feelings and taking responsibility to tell the truth to yourself. We are never victims except by our own choice. Take five minutes to think about these short questions:
- What position do I normally start from in the Drama Triangle?
- Am I taking responsibility for my actions and behaviours?
- What boundaries would it be good for me to draw, internally or externally?
Andy McBride
The exhibition by an authentic leader of self-awareness, balanced processing, relational transparency and authentic behaviour can be expected to foster a trusting relationship with followers, greater productivity, increased employment satisfaction and enhanced well being in you as a leader. In this guest post Brian Heasley looks at the concept of Balanced Processing.
We have all been subject at some point to unbalanced processing.
The cry of many a child is “that’s not fair”. They feel that the punishment meted out to them was different from that meted out to their sibling for a previous similar offence. If you are a parent, you will realise that you may have been the arbitrator of such a decision. If we are honest with ourselves, there are times when we must admit that our processing wasn’t balanced. Time of day, energy levels, hunger levels, busyness levels all affected the decision we made in the moment. Thankfully most parents are relatively consistent in their decision making moments; however if they are consistently unbalanced and frequently make poor snap decisions, they breed distrust and uncertainty. Their leadership of their children starts to display inauthentic patterns.
Authenticity increases when we consistently display and operate with a balanced method of assessing information and deciding outcomes.
Balanced processing involves consideration and communication.
When authentic leaders demonstrate a consistent and balanced approach to decision making, engaging in balanced processing instead of making snap decisions, followers will be more confident to place trust in future actions. They can use past experiences to predict future responses.
The more followers believe that their leaders are being true to themselves and behaving in accordance with their deeply held beliefs, the more likely they are to offer further dedication to the leader and the company they work for. In a climate of trust in management, each individual follower may see others’ loyalty and increase his or her own loyalty in response.
“Followers who perceive leader authenticity experience both greater levels of trust as well as development of their own capacities for authenticity and engagement in their work” (Gardner et al., 2005).
An ancient Hebrew proverb says “Good leaders cultivate honest speech; they love advisors who tell them the truth.” How do the following two statements make you feel and how often would you practice them?
- An authentic leader solicits views that challenge his or her deeply held positions.
- An authentic leader listens carefully to different points of view before coming to conclusions.
Brian Heasley
